Ways to respond if someone starts debating the validity of your feelings | Health



The way we feel is very personal. Sometimes people around us may not understand the intensity and the relevance of those emotions – however, that does not change the fact that we can feel those emotions. Sometimes we may feel challenged when we are faced with people who do not understand the meaning of those emotions. “When faced with someone who challenges how you feel, it’s not just about the words you use in response. It’s also about how you maintain your self-respect and emotional balance,” wrote Therapist Klara Kernig. She further added that strength of emotions resides in the way we share them with others – “Your feelings are inherently valid because you feel them. Remember, you’re not alone in this. We’ve all been there, and there’s strength in that shared experience.”

Ways to respond if someone starts debating the validity of your feelings(Unsplash)

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Be honest: One of the ways to combat people who do not validate our emotions is by being honest with them. Telling them the way we feel and the reason why we feel like that can help them to understand us better.

Stay grounded: Even when things start to get heated up, we should stay calm and try to understand the perspective of the other person. However, while we stay calm, we should also stay regulated and firm and stan by ourselves.

Practice self-compassion: Such situations can make us question our own emotions. It is important to be self-compassionate and be firm and know that what we feel is real.

Ask for clarification: Instead of feeling hurt, we should ask for clarification for the way they are feeling about our emotions.

Set boundaries: We should set healthy boundaries with the person who does not validate the emotions we are feeling. Instead of being reactive, we should let them know what we want and do not want from our relationship with them.

Seek supportive spaces: We should seek spaces and people who understand the way we feel, give us the independence to feel the way we want and support us through this emotional journey.

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